


Alone

by KillerQueeenBee



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Watcher Entertainment RPF
Genre: Angst, Gen, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 00:14:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29892717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillerQueeenBee/pseuds/KillerQueeenBee
Summary: AU where Shane Madej feels feelings like a regular human being. He suffers a loss and doesn't actually tell anyone or deal with it.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 14
Collections: Shyan Shipping Society Daily Prompts





	Alone

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Shyan Shipping Society Server prompt of: angst.

Shane would have seen the signs, if he had been home.

He would have seen the signs, if he hadn't been so tired.

He would have seen the signs, if he had cared to.

He should have seen the signs.

Instead, he saw only the consequences.

* * *

He is late to work. Ryan tries to ask about it, but Shane shrugs him off with a mumbled "sorry." He then puts on his headphones and prays that Ryan gets the message. 

He does.

Sooner than he hopes, it's time for them to film Watcher Weekly. He delivers a flat intro which only mildly improves after Katie scolds him. Ryan looks at him with concern written across every inch of his face, but Steven jumps in to do the intro and keeps them on track, even if his energy is slightly off because he knows he’s doing it for the wrong reasons. 

Shane makes an effort, he does. He musters up a false bravado, but he knows everyone can see through it. He can’t bring himself to care, though. He can’t make the smiles reach his eyes, or the laughs last as long as they normally do.

“Dude, what’s going on with you?” Ryan doesn’t even wait for the cameras to cut before he confronts him. 

“I’m _trying_ my best!” Shane blurts, gesturing wildly. “O-“ The words get stuck in his throat, and the weight of what he was going to say makes his vision start to swim. “I can’t. I’m sorry.” His voice barely comes out as a hoarse whisper as he tries to blink his vision clear. He’s on his feet and out the door before anyone can consider what to do or say.

Ryan makes to bolt for the door, but Steven manages to catch him by the wrist. “I don’t think he wants to talk right now, Ryan.” He points out.

* * *

His alarm went off and he stumbled around half-blind as he got dressed. Once he made it out to the kitchen, he quickly made his breakfast. He set the bowl of oatmeal down on the table next to his coffee and went to feed Obi. Cats like to eat socially, after all. That was when he poured food into Obi’s bowl.

That was when Obi didn’t come running. 

That was when he realized he hadn’t seen Obi last night, either.

He tore the place apart looking for his cat. He was worried Obi may have somehow slipped past him last night and run outside. He was mentally preparing himself to call every shelter, talk to all of his neighbors, make thousands of flyers, and anything else it might take, when he found him under the bed.

Shane picked Obi up and cradled him to his chest. “No, no, no, no, no. Obi, come on, wake up. You’re okay. It’s okay. Please. Wake up, sweet boy. Wake up for me. _Please, Obi_.” The tears came first, but the sobs followed immediately after. His body rocked back and forth as he clutched a lifeless Obi to his heart. He'd never felt so hurt by the loss of a pet before, but Obi had been there for him longer than any other pet had. Not to mention that Obi had been _his_ and only his. He remembered reading somewhere that cats usually hide away if they know they're sick or dying, and a new wave of sobs wracked his body.

* * *

When Shane gets home he knows what he has to do. He puts the fur-covered blanket into the box first. It was Obi's favorite. He then puts Obi in and stares down into the box. He feels only numb, now. His body has given all that it has to give. His head is pounding, and his heart is shattered. He can’t even bury him, like he could if he was _home_. He’s stuck in fucking LA and he has to take his cat in a box to the vet and pay to have him thrown into a fucking incinerator. 

Ryan’s called him three times now and texted him exponentially more than that, but he can’t deal with him right now. He can’t deal with anything right now. 

He turns his phone off.

* * *

When he gets home, Ryan is sitting on the ground outside with his back against the door to his apartment. He looks like he wants to yell at him for not answering his phone, but something about his appearance or demeanor makes Ryan instantly shift into Worried Mode.

"Will you _please_ talk to me?" Ryan pleads, scrambling to his feet. "What's wrong?" He hates seeing Shane like this but he can't help if he doesn't know what the problem is.

Shane unlocks his door and gestures inside. He doesn't know what he's supposed to say here. He doesn't want to talk to Ryan because he doesn't want to talk to _anyone._

Ryan can see Shane doesn't want to have this conversation so he instead tries to think of something else to focus on for a moment to try to make Shane relax enough to try to ask him again. "Where's Obi?" He asks, because the cat always runs to greet him at the door, no matter what hour of day.

The question is well-intended, but it slices through Shane and splits his heart in two. His throat works hard against the lump forming there and the urge to utterly break down is stronger than it's ever been. When he finally works up the courage to speak, he wishes he didn't.

"Gone."

"Oh, shit. I'm so sorry Shane." Ryan says softly. He reaches out to touch Shane's shoulder but lets his hand drop when Shane pulls away.

"I just want to be alone." 

Against his better judgement, Ryan leaves.

And Shane is completely alone.


End file.
